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Disaster approaches the
Roman Empire. The primitive Britannic
tribes—which, incidentally, are much like their modern counterparts, but
with better teeth—are about to launch a revolt
of unimaginable proportions. Realizing they
possess neither the martial nor culinary prowess
to conquer Rome, the Britons have concocted a
dastardly plan:
to build an army of Anglo Squirrels. When
released on Rome, the nefarious rodentia will
consume the city's grain reserves, causing
famine—or, should Romans switch to meat
products, high blood pressure—across the nation.
Rome herself is no stranger
to Botanical Warfare, having weathered the Great
Squirrel Crises of 27, 29, and 34 – 40 AD. To
solve such problems in the past, the Romans
prayed to Vesta, Goddess of the Hearth and
Squirrel Smitery.
Unfortunately, an unknown force has weakened
the gods as of late, and Olympus is being swallowed
by the Something. With the heavens in shambles,
more and more Romans are converting to Calpurnipalianism—a mysterious religion
which, founded
by and devoted to the empress Calpurnia,
has recently attracted a slew of celebrity
adherents, including the famed gladiator Necantio.
After a fateful prophecy,
Quintus, assistant publicist to Necantio, finds
himself on a journey to save Rome from the brink
of ruin. Can he uncover the Calpurnipalian
Church's deadly secret, restore power to
Olympus, and save Rome from the forces—squirrel
and otherwise—that imperil the empire? He'd certainly better, for Rome depends on
The Judgment of Quintus.
What To Expect
A madcap romp through
ancient Rome, The Judgment of Quintus
unites classical literature, drama, myth, and
history into an adventure of epic proportions
without being remotely educational or, for that
matter, accurate. Along the way, you will
experience:
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An epic journey
that takes you around and about the Roman
Empire with day trips to Olympus, the
Underworld, and lands as exotic as their
pronunciation.
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Countless dangers
including evil sorceresses, would-be
alchemists, plush animals, celebrity judges,
overprotective parents, underzealous
children, expectorant actors, resilient
stagehands, tour groups, vestal vegans,
Major-Generals, General-Majors, and, the
most feared of all beasts, the Gladiopossum.
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Thrilling characters
who defy all description, except that found
here.
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Pure
professionalism. From sharp, zany
writing to inspired artwork, as well as
professional voice acting and a dynamic
score recorded by live musicians, The
Judgment of Quintus holds itself to the
highest production values and promises
nothing short of an amazing theatrical
experience.
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